Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Change of tides.

Change of tides.
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Every now and then, we'll have our "okay that's it, I've had enough of this nonsense" moments, and I had one of those when my handphone beeped this afternoon. I'm tired of attempting to read minds and downright tired of creating excuses for myself and others. The other person may be an expert or a confused soul for all I care. Enough is enough.

Monday night telly seems to have lost its appeal - not a single laugh escaped my lip the entire night. Have I lost my sense of humour? I sure hope not for all your sakes. I wouldn't wish to stop dishing out my jokes and funny anecdotes! (snigger snigger) Haha.

Lamenting seems to be my forte of late. On yet another of my rants about leading a directionless and meaningless existence (I'm on a roll here), I posed my suffering boyfriend this question - What do you think of me? Now that sure stumped him, and myself actually. The question is seemingly more apt for a courting couple! Here's what he said - not his exact words of course.

"I think you seem unsure of what you want. Sometimes you do something that you think is it only to realize halfway that it isn't. But that's life. You need to take a few hard knocks to really figure out what it is you really want. And I think you're too free already. Too much time to think's not good."

He's right. I need something to OCCUPY this vacant mind of mine, pronto! Before I drive myself crazy attempting to lead a purpose-driven life.

Today's schedule was packed as usual, and for the sake of my sanity, boy am I thankful for it! Haha. Rolled outta bed bright and early (mind you, it's been weeks since I last woke up at 7ish) to go for my swim. Swimming alone with my pent-up frustration had me covering 30 laps in an hour. It's a whole half hour improvement in time! (Though I can't deny that previous sessions included gossip interludes...) And don't judge me, especially if you're a water-flyer (someone who flies through the water la). It's enough that I'm happy with my own results.

Seems like today is the unofficial meet-your-Comms-colleagues-day for me. Bumped into Eileen enroute to the swimming complex and that quick chat at the interchange might as well have been us in our ex-cubicles! Popped by the office for a quick meet-up with the team before zipping off to lunch with Pat and Joyce. Sometimes you don't know what you miss till it hits you in the face. I could hear Pat's chatter as I rounded the corner into the department and standing at my ex-area chatting with the familiar faces, it almost seemed as if I were still on my attachment. Internship may be a compulsary horror we poly students are subjected to, but I sure miss being around the Comms team.

After a quick money-exchange at Lucky Plaza, Marc, Jane and I headed down to KBox (I know, it's so weird!) for some screaming singing therapy. Screeching, falsettos, idiotic dance moves and hyena-like laughter basically made up the majority of our three hours in there, but there were (a few) soulful moments of course. What a night.

Bangkok's less than four days away. I'm looking forward to getting out of my comfort zone. Hopefully it'll get me out of this somewhat self-created rut I'm stuck in. Night world. :)

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