Saturday, September 30, 2006

Oh no I've said too much, I set it up.

Oh no I've said too much, I set it up.
feeling: bummed out.
music: r.e.m. - losing my religion

Chanced upon a 15-day tour of Bali's lesser known areas. Rustic; less touristy. Sounds like a slice of paradise, but at a hefty cost, as usual. And it's impossible Ceci will be able to get that many days worth of leave. Also, it'd probably be more relaxing covering Bali at our own pace, no? Haha, sour grapes.

Spent a good four hours clearing the assignments and project work that have piled up over the week while I was busy jamming and filming. Urghs. I had no idea there was so much to do. I've made significant enough a dent in the pile I think.

I've lost myself. Need to find me back. Now if only I could pack up and go. Life's too much of a bitch to be this easy.

Speaking of bitch, here's what mine had to say to me yesterday.

Me: -after dropping my stuff for the umpteenth time- "I don't know what's wrong with me!"
Bitch: "You really wanna know?"
Me: -aims dry look-
Bitch: -ignores look- "Cos you're clumsy!"

My blister's one disgusting... thing. Hurt like a bitch (ha ha woman) for the past two days. I've put off activity long enough. Am gonna tape it up up and have my workout in the morning.

Dear nanny... I'm not telling!

Dinner party coming up. Time flies. Okay so I'm not really one for parties.. but I'm really looking forward to seeing all my beloveds together in the room. Gives me a chance to play host heh heh.

Off I go. The inspiration to write strikes.

Misunderstood cigarette butts.

Misunderstood cigarette butts.

I replaced my gold thong sandals with a pair of leopard printed ones, thinking it was time for a change and to take a walk on the wild side. Eh, haha. Wore them for the first time yesterday and when I put them back on after leaving the studio, I noticed a hole in the right sole. Figured it was some inconsiderate smoker who dropped his cigarette ash on them. Came home at night. The left sole was all flaky too. Urghs.

Wild side doesn't work for Leigh.

Off I go.

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Making me laugh when I thought I wouldn't even be able to smile. No one does it better than you bitch.

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Look who I bumped into! A fit a fab Nelson Khoo.

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Bet he lost at least 10 kg!

Friday, September 29, 2006

Good morning sunshine.

Good morning sunshine.
feeling: no less overwhelmed
music: jason mraz - i'm yours

The sun's asleep behind the clouds. Would have been a beautiful day if not for the stillness in the air. The kind that subtly stifles and leaves people walking around with sweat stains under their arms.

Had the most abstract and random of dreams. A mix of black & white and colour. Me, checking into a colonial bed & breakfast on my own for two nights with nothing but a book, sunblock and change of clothes. Sitting by the tiny pool and bumping into an old friend. Riding down the escalator at Cineleisure.

Feels like I haven't quite slept at all, and out I have to go. Time to admit that I'm spreading myself too thin? Perhaps, but it'll all be a-ok after next week. I'm just gonna have to formulate a couple of escape routes for some downtime that's all. It'll all be good. I'll make sure of that. Off I go.

Muffles.

Muffles.

Just ended a conversation with the babe woman nanny. Haha! So sleepy. Am 1.5 hours past by self-imposed bedtime. And no work done.

Hall activities streaming in. I've got a block committee meeting on my birthday. Ecks. Next up's the CS gig. Double ecks. I hope we nail the songs. And then come next next week, there's sing&strum rehearsals and performance. What have I gotten myself into?

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Somewhere in between.

Somewhere in between
feeling: overwhelmed
music: lifehouse - somewhere in between





We were 15 the last time we went to the beach. Took us a good five years bitch, haha. I've missed hanging out with her, and considering how often we're meeting this week, we sure are making up for lost time.

We've made plans. Treetop walk. Mastering cycling before 2007 rolls along. Checking out VivoCity when it's done. Pulau Ubin trip. Do-able? Wait till you see that woman's schedule. It'll probably put up a good fight against the president's, haha.

It's been awhile since I've been out in the sun with the sole purpose of getting a tan, though I seriously shouldn't anymore. But it's my guilty pleasure, sun seeking.

Jamming.. was enlightening. Transposing takes a hell lot of time. Part 2 on Saturday. Urghs. So many things, so little time. I'm left monosyllabic.

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Seeing how stressed out I've been of late, she got me a ladybird massager... she can be quite the sweetie huh!

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In the queue for a good 30 minutes!

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Thank you Ceci. :)

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I like the menu.

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The ladybird that ate New York.

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Acting all touristy, pretending we're really in New York.

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I love nachos.

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This is such a breakfast shot don't you think!

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Jemo.

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Ben and Jerry's.

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The bad influencers.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Take a glorious bite out of the whole world.

Take a glorious bite out of the whole world.
feeling: a tad vulnerable
music: matchbox twenty - hand me down

It's been a long two days. Each day I return home drained from the day's activities. Just as well. Falling asleep's never been easier.

Post-filming project lunch with my 111 group morphed into a ghost-story telling session. Our enthusiasm was interrupted halfway by two kind(?) souls who sat us through a 30-minute survey on finance, but gave us each a free movie ticket for our time. Gain some, lose some.

The project discussion never happened by the way. It's been postponed to 10am on a Saturday. Burn it baby.

Sat with The Time Traveler's Wife by the pool after a quick swim. Pity it was too cloudy a day to watch the sun set, or I'd have felt like I was with Clare and Henry in the meadows depicted so vividly in the book. That said, to be able to lounge and read was a nice change in pace from the hustle and bustle that's seemed to become second nature.

Chacha was confusing. And funny.
YH: "Eh, you only can turn this way cannot turn that way is it?" when I repeatedly turned to my left instead of my right.

Dinner with Erwin at JP after. After the past couple of weeks of random snapping, it was just good to sit down and hang out and eat without being at each others' throats at every other sentence.

Oh yes, dinner with Ceci and Jem at NYNY tomorrow. Less crowds please. Crossing my toes.

Filming yet again tomorrow morning. Night.

Full circle.

Full circle.

What a familiar sight. The bridge. The river. The mildly oppressive heat. And the strangely comforting smell of petroleum.

I've been here before. Almost two years ago. Black polo tees on a Saturday. We've come full circle.

The resignation that filled me then was absent today. In its place is a throbbing emptiness. Of memories. Bitter-tinged release. Of love lost and friendship gained.

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Figuring out camera angles.

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At the CS benches. Erwin thought it interesting how three girls could be connected to a single laptop.

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Sleepy

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and rumple-faced.

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Beauty in adversity.

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Fagan was really onto the whole "who's that mystery girl he's with" idea haha. The picture turned out this way because my finger blocked the camera flash, oops.

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Originally uploaded by sarongskirts.

Me: Check that out!
Fagan: Haha, looks like zebra crossing.
Me: No la! It's red and black! Zebra crossing's white and black!
Fagan: Zebra crossing for clowns.
Me: ROFL.

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Originally uploaded by sarongskirts.

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A very unglamorous candid shot, but it looked like that man was bowing to me haha!

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Mucking around.

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Yum.

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Good friends share calories.

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My bitch the piano teacher.

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P9247083
Originally uploaded by sarongskirts.

Monday, September 25, 2006

Does anybody know the way to Atlantis?

Does anybody know the way to Atlantis?
feeling: smothered
music: jason mraz - i'm yours

Took myself to the beach in the afternoon. Sat by the waters for a good three hours in the company of my solitude, letting the sun warm my skin and tapping my feet to the beat of my music. Behind dark glasses, I enjoyed the psychological anonymity of being just another figure in the sea (pun not intended) of faces. Words and lyrics surfaced from my hours with myself, but I'd stupidly forgotten to pack my notebook along.

Dinner and catching up with my bitch in the night. We sure had lots to talk about, considering how we haven't spoken in months. But I like how it always feels like we've just met up the day before, no matter how much we've grown and changed as individuals over time.

Was really tempted by Vincent's offer to join them for a drink at Villa Bali when he came by to pick her up, but here I am at home prepping for tomorrow's filming. Writing love letters in braille. Not as easy peasy as I'd expected.

Off to travel the world in my sleep. I'm so gonna have to roll myself outta bed for my morning run. Night world.

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Cold logic.

Cold logic.
feeling: enlightened
music: jason mraz - i'm yours

An impromptu poolside swim. Got an unexpected tan and a sunburnt nose. An impromptu meetup with a good friend. Managed to catch a performance by Just Be (a local accapella group) by the Esplanade Waterfront. Really enjoyed it. Goofy antics by a group of extremely talented singers.

And then we sat by the river
Looking out to city lights
Minutes grew into hours
And time slipped out of sight

"Distance has no way of making love understandable". It does. Maybe not in understanding love, but perhaps in understanding life and the choices we have to make. Cold logic.

"We can have popcorn
And start watching porn
So we don't get born
Out of a lover's scorn"

Just came up with that popcorn nonsense with Jem. He's convinced I should go into rapping. ROFL. Yo yo check it out, Jemo yea Jemo's in da house.

Friday, September 22, 2006

Close the curtains.

Close the curtains.
feeling: mixed-up; zonked.
music: jason mraz - i'm yours

I've always wondered how people got by without sleep. Excluding the quick 15-minute shut-eye while waiting for my lunch kakis and a 30-minute catnap before zipping out to meet Charmain, I've gone on without sleep for almost 40 hours. Golly. My body's entered a state of mistaken hyperactivity. I think it's time for a shutdown.

The unexpected expected happened today. A cocktail of potent emotions' coursing through me, waiting to take control. Maybe it'll all hit me tomorrow.

Did we do the right thing? I don't know, but time will tell. It ain't fair to keep up the charade. Not when we know the impending finale. And not when I'm having lesser and lesser time for dress rehearsals.

The play may be over, but the essence of the script remains. Maybe one day, we'll stage a comeback.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Songs from an empty stomach.

Songs from an empty stomach.
feeling: ravenous
music: michelle branch - it's you

I haven't been able to think ever since I started my university term. Everything seems superficial, and I've seemingly lost my ability to critique and to look beneath the surface of things. Or could it be that I've always been fluffy without knowing it? I'd like to give myself a bit more credit than that though.

There are people around me, but I'm kinda in my own world until the gang's done with their filming. Could that be why friends have commented that I haven't been myself of late? "You're here, but not quite here," was something along the lines of what Charmain said I think.

I'm just more zonked than usual perhaps. Operating on four hours of sleep for successive days has become a hard habit to break. I don't quite fancy feeling like I'm about to fall over any minute though. And I'm running away from a decision overdue.

Currently waiting for the gang to finish their filming assignment before we head out for food. It's kinda refreshing sitting over here alone at the CS benches. It's been awhile since I've had the chance to be really alone. I love the company of people, but too much of a good thing is never good ain't it? I was just musing to LM that it'd only be a matter of time before the gang gets sick of one another's company. Till then, we'll just milk it I guess, haha.

Life isn't always a beach holiday. Or rather, I shouldn't always take life as I would a beach holiday. Laidback. Fuss-free. No expectations. Too idealistic really. Aren't the dynamics of friendship strange? Shan't ponder. Time to go.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Getting my act together.

Getting my act together.
feeling: decisive

After weeks of floundering like a fish out of water, the decision's finally come to me. (Though why when I'm half-dead trying to complete my assignment I do not know.) Did I really need that pathetic excuse to spur me on? Perhaps.

Blindly and aimlessly groping my way through it all just doesn't quite cut it anymore.

I see the most gorgeous sunsets through the glass roof in my hall. One day, I'll go up on the rooftop to take it all in. One day, before the beauty loses its allure. Even blogging this can be seen as procrastination.

Let's hope I stick this through.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Wise men say.

Wise men say.
feeling: zonked
music: richard marx - can't help falling in love

Sneaking in a quick post before I surrender to the allure of starting on my assignment, which is due at noon tomorrow by the way. Sitting around on wooden benches watching people go by, attempting to get my thoughts together - not productive. And so to the pool I went for abit of an escape. Reality beckons.

Yesterday's run with the girls was good. Something extremely empowering in ignoring my glutes' call for help and conquering those darn hills.

Sing & Strum auditions last night. As I was sharing with a few people, singing's always been a private pleasure. It doesn't matter how good or bad I really sound, as long as I sound good enough to myself. It was thus extremely intimidating to have to stand in front of a panel and be told on how bad/good I am. I think I did fine, but the jitters were...

I'd better get started on that darn piece of writing. Have got dance at 6:30, so that leaves me with barely 45 minutes to get it done. 1,2, cha cha cha.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Beware the tail.

Beware the tail.

It's kinda surreal sitting here in my room munching on bread and sipping tea when the rest of the world's in class. It's a naughty pleasure.

The one hour of sleep I had last night, not a very restful one at that, was barely enough to tide me through this morning's journalism lecture. And so I figured I'd skip the next three hours of lectures instead of getting pissy at everyone. Hah. It's amazing what a 1.5 hour siesta can do.

I have so many things to say, but my random thoughts are all jumbled up.

Wear sarong pants/skirt not poofy skirt. I can't possibly explain how odd it felt on Saturday night.

Time to rejoin the world back in tutorial.

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Rethinking Wonderland.

Rethinking Wonderland.
feeling: sleepy
music: evan and jaron - crazy for this girl

Paparazzi - The version of Alice in Wonderland staged by our very own CS seniors was really really good. At least to me and Charmain. I'm inspired to rewatch the cartoon.

Coffee at Starbucks with the gang thereafter. Doesn't anyone eat bagels with cream cheese and strawberry jam??? The whole savoury and sweet logic doesn't really apply 'cos I'll rebutt you with "don't you eat sweet and sour fish?"

I'm sleepy. I'll do a more comprehensive postmortem of the play should the mood strike tomorrow. Night world.

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Lunch made with love by my beloved auntie. I love coming home.

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Paparazzi.

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Tingyi and Layming. Uncle and auntie.. heh heh.

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Chrystal's eyes are opened! And Erwin still can't smile for the cameras.

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Flora and Sab.

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Tingyi making his moves on an exasperated Phoebe.

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Flora and I - auntie power!

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The gang, out in full force.

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Not all of us heard the "make funny face!" instruction.

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Tingyi and Clara.