"We are light bulbs in the electrical system of the universe."

The past month has been tough, very tough indeed. I've done the mental equivalent of climbing mountains and slaying dragons, and my spirit is worn and weary. I like to think the worst is over, but do dragons ever die, or do they only sleep?

I'd never been in this dark a place for so long a time, and it was a scary, scary place to be. A twisted wonderland of confusion where clouds of illusion and deceit swirled around me, nibbling at my soul and putting my core values to the test. There were times when I wished there was a greater power I could turn to. After riding on an endless merry-go-round of what-ifs, all I wanted to do was to thrust my decision into the hands of a more enlightened being. But to shirk the responsibility of shaping my life is a bit of a cop out, isn't it?

I ultimately fell back on the non-religion that's always worked best for me – catharsis. I don't doubt that I would have found some peace of mind sitting in a church or a temple, but it was through verbalising my innermost demons to the priests and priestesses of my heart that I got the clarity I needed.

However, this whole dark spell did get me thinking about religion, and I'm gonna go out on a limb here and try to tangibilise my often abstract notions. As much as I live life more by my personal rules of karma and goodwill than a particular faith, I do believe in God. I just haven't decided what form my God takes, or if he/she/it should even take any. Instead, I like to believe that God is within all of us.

Coincidentally enough, right after I'd exhausted all forms of catharsis and finally arrived at a decision, my colleague returned me my copy of Sarah McDonald's Holy Cow, which he'd been holding on to for several months. A few nights later, I thumbed idly through the book and started re-reading it from a middle chapter, and a particular paragraph jumped off the page. In it, McDonald was discussing Hinduism and the concept of God.

"God is not a judgemental giant sitting up in heaven, it's a force within us all – we are light bulbs in the electrical system of the universe."

See, I always knew that if push came to shove and I had to choose a religion to save my life, I'd pick Hinduism.